Daily Star

As Boris Johnson prepares to return to No 10, the Daily Star has moved on from its Lettuce analogy to compare him to an aubergine.

“Lettuce rejoice”, proclaims the Daily Star on its front page, which shows a live-streamed lettuce outliving Liz Truss.

According to the Daily Star, the prime minister has been “cut to shreds” following today’s House of Commons melee.

As a result of the energy crisis, the National Grid boss has warned that power cuts could occur between 4pm and 7pm this winter.

A live stream pitting Liz Truss against a lettuce has been broadcast by The Daily Star.

The Daily Star claims that the King plans to sell 12 racehorses owned by his late mother.

In a live stream, The Daily Star asks readers whether Liz Truss will lose her job before a lettuce decays.

The Daily Star’s front page predicts a lettuce bought for 60p will outlive Liz Truss as prime minister at 6/1 odds.

Couples who have split up live together despite financial issues in what the Daily Star calls the “cost of loathing crisis”.

A scammer claiming to be an astronaut fleeced a love-struck woman by saying that he needed £27,000 for “landing fees”.